Happy New Year! 

What a wonderful New Year celebration it was - Logan and I were both in the wedding party of fellow pageant friend and baseball wife, Jordan Johannsen and her sweet, adorable husband, Logan Bawcom. We had an amazing time closing out 2014 and beginning the new year together with best friends.  

As I think about the coming year and all the possibilities, I am overwhelmed by God's goodness and how many doors He has opened to make this year one full of dreams coming true.


Logan was recently picked up in the Rule 5 draft (see earlier post for my attempt to explain the process) by the Baltimore Orioles. He will be starting the year on the 25-man roster at Spring Training, and if he continues to work as hard as he has these past three years, he will hopefully start the season in April on the Big League Roster! We've been treated so well by the Orioles fans thus far as they have welcomed us with open arms to "Bird Land." 


I will miss our Mets family tremendously and all the wonderful men and women we have met through the organization. The Mets gave Logan his initial opportunity to play professional baseball, and because of their belief in him, the Mets will always have a special place in our heart. 

With so much excitement happening these past few weeks, and very little time to reflect on it all, I have finally sat down and tried to take it all in. Ultimately, I am attempting to prepare myself for his year's ups and downs, whatever they may be while setting new goals and aspirations for 2015. After reading several articles on 'New Year's Resolutions everyone should have,' I was most inspired by Elite Daily's post and from that have cut, spliced and responded to those I want to apply to my life this coming year. Behold -- 15 Resolutions for 2015:

2. Don’t focus on losing weight, just focus on being healthy. Think about what you are putting into your body and make time to exercise. Your body is your greatest asset, take care of it. Run in the American Odyssey Relay. 

3. Continue to invest in those relationships that I value. Don't become discouraged because everyone else is busy. Instead, be persistent in your efforts to see those you love and cherish. 


4. Learn a new skill. There is always room for you to improve, but it doesn’t always have to be life changing. Don’t ever feel limited in your growth potential. Take a calligraphy class and practice the art of writing!

5. Stay off your phone in the company of others. If you can’t appreciate the time you are spending with that person, re-evaluate if that person is even worth your time.

6. Keep a journal. Writing about things that made you happy in the last 24 hours lets you relive the happiness. Otherwise, being able to look back on how you were feeling and reading what you were thinking at any given time is something you can appreciate down the line. Make an effort to blog once a month and journal privately three times a week. 

7. Conquer a fear and learn to embrace failure, remember it is a part of the process. The only time you’re not allowed to fail is when you have not exhausted all your options. If you failed, you did something most people won’t ever do. You tried. If you have trouble starting, stop making excuses and start again. If there is something you want to do, just f*cking do it. Learn how to buy & sell residential real estate just for fun. 

8. Learn to cook. Eating out every day is only going to make you wonder where your money went. Eventually, you will have to learn to take care of yourself, but it’s also a skill you can use to impress that special someone. Learn to poach eggs and make a hollandaise sauce from scratch so we can enjoy Eggs Benedict on a weekend at home :) 

9. Leave the country – These past three years Logan and I have traveled to so many new and exciting places within the U.S. for baseball and this past fall we took a few fun trips to Napa and Annapolis. This year, we are making it a goal to save enough money for a trip to Italy in the fall. I’ve been planning on making this happen for three years, and 2015 is finally here! Let’s do it! 

10. If you hate your job, quit your job. Love what you do, and you will never work another day in your life. Continue to invest in my businesses and capitalize on my strengths to contribute to my team and thus. 

11. Practice meditation. Meditation is not about thinking of nothing. It helps build your awareness of your own thoughts and how you think about and treat others. With every distraction we have in this world, meditation helps you practice focus so you can appreciate being in the present. Do Yoga once a week, at least. 

12. Figure out the areas of your life where you want to improve, and ask for help. There are plenty of benefits to having mentors, but make sure you are ready before you start looking. Meet with financial advisor to find out how minimize debt on auto and student loans and help us create a budget fit for our lifestyle.

13. Start your day by expressing gratitude for what you have. Giving thanks and appreciating what you have allows you to scan the world with a positive mindset to uncover opportunities. Begin a morning "quiet time" with a Bible Study. 

14. Drink more water. It is easy to forget how important water is to living. Skip the sugary drinks and make water your new favorite beverage, you will live guilt free. 

15. Do first things first. We do a lot of things that are not urgent and not important to us but it’s often where most of our time goes. Think about everything that you do and how much it contributes to your overall happiness. If it isn’t helping your cause, don’t do it.

Cheers!   - E

I'm a dreamer. Always have been, always will be. 
Throughout my life I've wanted to be

• an actress
  
• a dallas cowboys cheerleader
  
• a professional dancer
  
• miss teen texas
  
• a model
• a news anchor
• miss texas
  
• a sports broadcaster
  

^^^Pretty big dreams, right? ^^^
I was raised to "Dream Big" and "Go Big or Go Home." 
Therefore, I've always been in the middle of doing something completely outrageous. 

Around this time last year I started dealing with a huge internal battle. 
Have I given up on my dreams? 

I was talking to another baseball fiance just the other night, and come to find out I'm not the only one that's struggled with this. 

Our generation has us believing that as women it is our responsibility to no longer be a shadow behind our husband. Unlike 50 years ago when cooking & cleaning were supposed to be our main priorities, now I feel as though becoming a supportive wife and nothing more is looked down upon.

Prime Example: During Spring Training there was a girlfriend that came to visit. During one of our first conversations she gave me the, "Soooo what do you do?" She was pursuing another degree. I felt so inferior. After all my endeavors and successes, my new "non-busy" lifestyle was overshadowing the fact that I was the happiest I think I've ever been. Of course I tried to explain how I'm working part-time and training for a marathon... does it matter? I don't need to explain myself.  God simply led me in a different direction from her and I felt judged because of it.

I’m tired of being judged. For 20 years I was judged and that’s what my success was dependent upon. Dependent upon the opinions of others. In dance they line up 5 or 7 judges to watch you, then write down what they think you should be scored, in their opinion. In pageants they choose several people, some that have never been to a pageant, to decide who takes home the crown. So go ahead society. Judge on. I'm used to it. :)
But throughout all that judging I realized this: (prepare yourself for a super-duper cliche)

 Winning is not about taking home the trophy, {Okay, so I never complained when I got one} because in my experiences, you can win because you were second all across the board, or lose because one judge scored you in last place.  Winning is about the process. It’s the discipline and hard work you put into something and being able to look back and see all that you got out of it. Life is about the process of reaching that ultimate goal, eternal life through Christ. Being able to look back and know that you did your best to live the way Christ intended. The hardest part is figuring out what Christ intends for you to do with the life you've been given. 

Either way you’re faced with the fear of regret. If you don’t follow your dreams will you forever wonder “what if?” If you don’t follow the one you love will you forever think about “what could’ve been?”

Obviously I chose the one that I dream of. The thrill of auditioning is incredible, but I get more of a thrill watching Logan pursue his dream. I find more happiness knowing that we’re living it out together. I have more satisfaction in knowing I’ve found the love of my life. 

Maybe I don't have a law degree. Maybe I'm not as career-driven as society expects (or as my 15-year-old self expected me to be). When I look back at my life 50 years from now, I want to see all the time I put into my family and friends. I want to remember the smiles they put on my face and all the crazy moments we had together. I want to relive the time Logan and I spent Easter Sunday driving from Florida to NY looking like the Beverly Hillbillies hauling my car.

Go ahead and pursue your career. Heck, become CEO of a Fortune 500 Company. You go girl! Like I said before, I'm a dreamer and I support all other dreamer's dreams! But don't look at a woman that has made the decision to follow her husband or quit her job to stay at home with her family and think she gave up on her dreams. 


That's not what happened. She considered her options and her dreams changed. 

So accept the life God has led you to live. It might not be what you always dreamed of, 
It may be something even better! 

-E